What do electrons know of time?

Another human marked segment of time has passed. Internally, it feels like my “year” ended and began again around mid-December, and not just because I turned 62, either. It was more like a singularity of depression and darkness that rebounded into some lightness and positive energy of planning and looking to the future. Maybe more related to the amount of sunlight, like a plant that grows with the seasonal changes. Well, that begs the question, how do we know if plants “feel” the way we humans define it? Can I relate to a perennial?

Not a big fan of wholesale big changes in general. I prefer making the small changes that lead to different paths. Having said that, the big theme for this year will be courage and confronting fear. My niece, Allison, obtained her doctorate in Marine biology on December 18 of 2024. She defended her thesis on studying the effects of temperature and salinity on phytoplankton populations in the Western Antarctic Peninsula over a four year period utilizing citizen science as data collection module. That’s a mouthful! The Cusick’s now have a doctor of higher education in the house, how about that? My mother and father would be proud and amazed.

She and I were discussing her next steps and the period of transition that comes after a big accomplishment or milestone. Buddhists refer to the Bardo, which is normally discussed in reference to consciousness and post-death but it can also be looked at as a transitional phase after any death of any life moment; a bardo period after a tragedy or trauma, a big change in circumstances like marriage, a job, moving great distances. It’s about the pause of the stationary-but-not-stationary moment in between, when you exert energy on reorienting yourself to a new direction not yet understood. We discussed the fear of the unknown, the path ahead that’s not quite come into view and the human tendency to cling to old habits and ways of being even if it’s unhealthy and stagnant simply because the familiarity is a comfort.

COURAGE: being afraid but doing the thing anyway.

She’s off to Antartica to continue her adventures and work on planning her next science career steps right now. I’m turning over the giant orb of fear that resides within me to confront the things that have been holding me back.

Baby steps that will feel like bold moves.

2025 begins.